


kissdrunk in the dark

by khattikeri



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Getting Together, Kissing, M/M, Messy Makeout Sessions, Seven Minutes In Heaven, ouma regrets his life decisions for 0.02 seconds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-10-23 06:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17678204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khattikeri/pseuds/khattikeri
Summary: Shuichi faintly wondered to himself what it would be like to make Ouma shut up for once.





	kissdrunk in the dark

**Author's Note:**

  * For [landofplagueandlullabies](https://archiveofourown.org/users/landofplagueandlullabies/gifts).



> Alternate summary: So there's romantic tension from Ouma's massive crush, Saihara's general muted anxiety, and their disastrously high UST, all shoved together in a cramped closet for seven minutes. What could possibly go wrong?

Parties were fun sometimes, Shuichi could admit, especially with his group of friends. He liked being with them and playing games with them. But this game in particular was going to drive him insane.

Why, you ask? Because he was stuck in a dark closet with the one and only Ouma Kokichi.

 _Who invented seven minutes in heaven?_ Shuichi thought to himself. _I’d like to have a few words with them._

Maybe in another universe, Ouma would’ve just stayed quiet. Maybe he would have thought, _I don’t need to make a big deal out of this,_ and then stayed mum in the corner quietly for seven minutes. Absolutely nothing would happen and Shuichi would get to leave and none of his friends outside would get the smug satisfaction of witnessing the aftermath of debauchery.

Of course, that would only happen if an alien took over Ouma’s body or something. Ouma had to tease people somehow, and Shuichi was unfortunately no exception.

“Saihara-chan~” Ouma whispered in sing-song. “You haven’t answered any of my questions yet, how boring!” Crocodile tears sprouted from his eyes. “Y-You’re gonna m-make me cry, you know?”

It wasn’t that he hated Ouma or anything. No, quite the contrary. Ouma was an enigma: hard to read yet enticing to the point that Shuichi wished they could be closer to each other-- closer friends, at the very least, if not anything more the way Shuichi wanted. He found himself profoundly interested in the other boy, and if his deductions were correct, Ouma was equally enamored with him.

Ouma switched face again. “Just kidding! Wow, Saihara-chan, you’re really holding up!” he giggled. “I’m surprised, considering how horny anyone else would be if they were stuck with sexy, adorable me in such a tight closet!”

 _Are you trying to be Iruma-san?_ Shuichi thought, half irritated, half tired from all the buzzing noise Ouma was making. _Jeez, it’s barely been a minute and a half..._

Maybe Ouma wasn’t “enamored” with him. How was Shuichi supposed to know? Ouma was a very talented liar, and he made a habit of jeering at everyone, regardless of how much he personally liked or disliked them.

“Are you tuning me out, Saihara-chan? How insolent!”

Ouma blabbed on and on, each subsequent word making Shuichi’s head spin more, even though he knew that a good 85% of Ouma’s chatter was just fishing for a reaction from him.

Shuichi glanced at his watch. _...Four and a half minutes left._ His eyes had finally adjusted to the pitch darkness of the closet, enough that he could barely make out the outline of Ouma’s face in front of him.

“--but do you need to get laid or something, Saihara-chan? If so, you should join my secret organization after we get out of here!” Ouma said (probably grinning). “We’re always willing to--”

Shuichi faintly wondered to himself what it would be like to make Ouma shut up for once.

“I like you, Ouma-kun,” he interrupted.

Ouma froze for a split second; Shuichi continued before he could get a word in.

"I like you. A lot,” he confessed again. He groaned softly. “But please, _please,_ be quiet for me."

Almost unsurprisingly, Ouma went right back to talking the way he always had been. “Wooow, Saihara-chan! That was so bold of you!” he looked at his nails, bored. “But too bad for you, supreme leaders can’t be silenced! So even though you want it, you can’t make me--”

Shuichi made his move. _Oh, yeah? Watch me,_ he thought to himself.

=

Kokichi could lie all he wanted, but he couldn’t lie to his own feelings.

He was in love with Saihara Shuichi. That much was a fact. Whether or not Saihara knew about it was irrelevant, as was whether Saihara actually liked him back-- though the other boy may be a detective, he was pretty romantically inept, so Kokichi didn’t see a problem in being more obvious with his hints. Games like these irked Kokichi a bit, but if he was given the opportunity to flirt, _he was going to flirt._

...That being said, it was rather hard to do that when your opponent was dead silent the whole time.

 _I know I love you because you’re hard to read, but goddammit, say something,_ Kokichi thought in frustration as he spoke some other random cacophony of confusing lies out loud. _Anything. Any day now._

Saihara merely stared at him the whole time-- or at least, that’s what it looked like, in the dark. It was hard to tell. Kokichi didn’t know what time it was, but a decent amount of it must have passed if his vision was starting to get less black and fuzzy.

“--but do you need to get laid or something, Saihara-chan?” Kokichi asked, bringing awe into his voice. He grinned cheekily. “If so, you should join my secret organization after we get out of here! We’re always willing to--”

"I like you, Ouma-kun," Saihara interrupted.

Kokichi froze for a split second; Saihara apparently took that as a cue to continue.

"I like you. A lot,” he confessed again. He groaned softly. “But please, _please,_ be quiet for me."

Kokichi decided now was time to abort mission. “Wooow, Saihara-chan! That was so bold of you!” he then looked at his nails, feigning disinterest. “But too bad for you, supreme leaders can’t be silenced! So even though you want it, you can’t make me--”

What happened next was too fast for Kokichi to even respond.

There was a shuffle of movement-- a quick blur of Saihara’s shadow. The last thing Kokichi registered was the surprisingly cold feeling of Saihara's fingers on his face, tilting it upward as Saihara crushed their lips together.

 _“Mm?!”_ Kokichi’s eyes widened a fraction, taken by surprise, then screwed shut. "Mmh--!" he dug his nails into Saihara's shoulders.

 _Ultimate Supreme Leaders don’t lose challenges like this._ He pushed against Saihara, kissing back and attempting to take the lead, but Saihara only nipped Kokichi’s lip, eliciting a small gasp. As if in a trance, Saihara moved his mouth to Kokichi’s ear and whispered:

**_“My pace.”_ **

His voice sent shivers down Kokichi’s spine; Kokichi completely melted, beet red, all dignified responses fleeing his mind. “Okay,” he squeaked back, voice so high pitched he would’ve died of embarrassment had anyone else heard it.

Meanwhile, Saihara took the opportunity to return to Kokichi’s lips.

Kokichi briefly wondered if this was really both of their first kisses-- they certainly _seemed_ like an inexperienced pair, if the teeth clicking and awkward positioning had anything to say about it. But the passion made up for it, in a way. This could fuel at least twelve new fantasies, now that Kokichi thought about it.

He saw a flash of Saihara’s watch and attempted a mental calculation: three minutes and twelve-ish seconds left.

Saihara was oddly... _bold_ when he was irritated. Not exactly forceful, but definitely domineering. Kokichi’s head spun as Saihara pressed more insistently into his mouth, sweetly caressing his face. Aha! A physical oxymoron: Saihara’s lips were attacking him like beasts, but his hands held Kokichi as if he was something tender to love and behold.

 _…Genuine affection like that’s a little too much for me to handle,_ Kokichi decided tentatively. _Maybe I should pull apart and ridicule him to break his--_

Then, Saihara slipped in his tongue.

Instantly, Kokichi moaned, all thoughts of pushing Saihara away dissipating as his eyes slid shut. He latched onto Saihara’s arms (or were those just his sleeves?) for leverage as his knees weakened. His mind felt dizzy, dizzy, dizzy; his lips were tingly; his tongue felt wet and warm and weird, and his everything was heating up faster than if someone were to set him on fire.

It was _so_ good.

His cheeks flushed; his face felt burning red hot, his heart felt hot, the closet and everything else around him felt hot and sweaty and almost uncomfortably cramped, but Kokichi didn’t want it to stop. He couldn’t think straight at all-- not even to analyze Saihara’s reactions or the amount of time they had left.

This was anarchy in its purest form: Kokichi’s thoughts were completely deconstructed and utterly incoherent, with the exception of _Shuichi Shuichi Shuichi_ playing over and over in his mind like a desperate mantra as his lips and tongue became more wet and numb.

(Saihara’s watch continued forward, showing that they had two minutes and nine seconds.)

Saihara broke the kiss for a moment to breathe, letting the strands of saliva that linked their lips slowly snap apart. Kokichi took in a gulp of air for the first time in ages, only to have it be sucked back by Saihara kissing him again, now languidly melding their mouths together.

 _He’s so good,_ Kokichi thought dazedly as he let out a small whine, feeling faint in the head from Saihara’s teasing ministrations. _I don’t want him to stop, but I won’t last for much longer either…_

As if on cue, Kokichi’s knees buckled, sending them both to the floor, clutching each other’s shoulders and gasping for air.

(Kokichi wondered how he was supposed to breathe when Saihara had left him a completely blushing, panting, utterly ravished mess.)

At that same instant, Saihara's watch beeped; still catching his breath, Saihara put an arm around Kokichi’s back and hugged him close. Vision clearing, Kokichi saw the bright green numbers on Saihara’s watch out of the corner of his eyes.

A minute and a half left.

Despite how wet it felt earlier, Kokichi’s mouth was suddenly dry. He swallowed his spit. His mouth was still dry. Kokichi licked his lips and found that they were completely and utterly swollen, puffy and pink.

He tried speaking, though he was still winded. “Sai--” his voice cracked.

Saihara let out a horrified squeaking noise and began talking like a whirlwind, eyes wide. "Oh jeez I should’ve said something or asked permission what was I thinking doing something like that oh god I needed consent first why did I do that out of nowhere all of a sudden Ouma-kun are you okay hello HELLO are you alright are you dying did I hurt you was that bad what--"

“Saihara-chan,” Ouma rasped in protest. _Holy shit, I can’t even speak properly._ He made an attempt at clearing his throat and tried again, placing a hand on Saihara’s cheek. “Saihara-chan, calm down,” his voice still crackled.

“I can’t!” Saihara hissed; his voice was also pretty messed up, now that Kokichi actually listened to it. “That was so shameless and indecent and rude, I shouldn’t have--”

“I _liked_ it, though,” Kokichi croaked again, and he was pleasantly surprised at the realization that he truly felt that way, even after the high was mostly gone. He giggled, though it sounded more like a possessed squeaky toy than his usual cutesy laugh. “ ‘s probably the most assertive you’ve ever been with me.”

“Even if you did, I should’ve asked you out properly first,” Saihara’s face burned indignantly. “Instead of, y’know, shoving my tongue down your throat and kissing you half to death.”

Kokichi only sighed contently in response, letting his head fall onto Saihara’s chest and wrapping his arms around the taller boy in a hug.

Saihara looked at his watch as he returned the hug. “...Ten seconds left. Any excuses in mind for when the others interrogate us?”

Kokichi grumbled like an inconvenienced cat, burrowing his head deeper into Saihara’s chest. Saihara giggled softly, affectionately petting his head. “Okay, okay. I'll take that as a no.”

The door opened, and the two of them stepped out, Kokichi attached to Saihara like a stubborn koala to a tree.

“Wow,” Iruma whistled. “Can’t believe you managed to deal with that little gremlin for seven minutes, Suckhara!” Several of the others snorted in laughter.

 _(Accurate, considering how hard he sucked my face,_ Kokichi thought.)

“I agree,” Toujo hid her amusement behind a gloved hand. “Sorry for putting you in the wringer there, Saihara.”

"Your face looks kinda red," Akamatsu observed sheepishly. "Sorry for the trouble, Saihara-kun!"

"You look exhausted, too," Harukawa remarked. "That bastard really must've tired you out, huh?" 

“Ouma didn’t do anything to you, did he?” Momota asked, somewhat concerned, though still grinning.

“Aside from clinging to you and yammering away like crazy, he means,” Hoshi noted drily.

“Ah… Yeah,” Saihara said awkwardly. “Not much happened. He was actually, uh... quieter than normal, you could say...”

In a surge of irritation, Kokichi pinched him near the waist. Saihara let out a small hiss under his breath. _"Ouch!"_

“Everything alright between both of you?” Amami asked, looking by far most entertained out of everyone in the room. Kokichi felt Saihara wince; Amami had _definitely_ figured it out.

“Yeah,” Saihara managed. “He’s kinda half asleep, so I’m gonna go-- uh, take him to his room.”

“That sounds reasonable,” Kiibo nodded. “Allow me to assist! We’ve already made you share time and space with him for several minutes, so--”

Amami held Kiibo back. “No need,” he smiled at Saihara and Kokichi, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “You should get some water, for him, Saihara-kun! Since he _talked_ so much that he got tired and fell asleep, Ouma-kun’s throat is probably _dying_ right about now.”

_Damn him._

Saihara took Amami’s advice and gave Kokichi some water; then, they bolted out of the party and into Kokichi’s dorm room, heaving sighs of relief once they arrived.

“Crap, he’s never gonna let us go for that,” Saihara wheezed. “I could barely look Amami-kun in the eye--”

On impulse, Kokichi took Saihara’s face in his hands and kissed him, absolutely relishing Saihara’s scrambling and muffled noise of surprise. _Heh. Revenge is sweet._

“We’re alone again,” he whispered coyly as he separated from Saihara. “If you want--”

“What I want is for you to sleep,” Saihara said firmly, pushing Kokichi away, and if Kokichi didn’t have any pride he would’ve thrown a tantrum right there on the spot. “It was fun, but you’re exhausted and both our lips are sore.”

Kokichi blinked at him. “You had fun kissing me?”

Saihara flushed. “I-- Yes.”

Kokichi beamed. “Aww, how sweet!” His face morphed, now taunting. “Too bad though, kissing you was an absolute nightmare, Saihara-chan! Slimy and gross on all fronts!”

Saihara rolled his eyes, amused. “Yes, yes, I’m terrible. Either way, you said back there that you enjoyed it. Now tuck yourself in, or else Amami-kun might volunteer to come check on us.”

Kokichi pouted. “Fiiiiine.”

Saihara continued standing there _(like an idiot,_ Kokichi thought) while Kokichi clambered into his bed and pulled the covers up, too wiped out to even bother changing his clothes.

“Saihara-chan?” he asked.

“Yeah?”

Kokichi hesitated. “...Are we a couple now?”

“Mhm,” Saihara whispered. “I’d say we are.” He paused cautiously. “Do you… Do you feel the same?”

Kokichi almost lied, but stopped himself. “...I do,” he admitted.

Saihara paused again, thoughtful, then moved to the side of the bed. Kokichi’s face was peeking out of the blankets. Saihara gently swept Kokichi’s bangs to the side and pressed his lips to the boy’s forehead.

“Ah,” Kokichi short-circuited.

Saihara let out a quiet laugh, hiding his joy behind his hand. “Goodnight, Ouma-kun. See you tomorrow. Sweet dreams.”

Kokichi burrowed deeper into the blankets. “You, too, Saihara-chan,” he called out.

Saihara walked towards the door, taking a last look at Kokichi before turning off the lights and leaving.

After the door shut, Kokichi allowed himself to put a hand on his forehead, where Saihara’s warm touch lingered.

For once, Kokichi was glad that he didn’t lie about how he felt.

=

As he let the door to Ouma’s room click shut, Shuichi couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

Maybe seven minutes in heaven wasn’t so bad after all.

**Author's Note:**

> To my brother, in case he found this and read it all the way through: sorry kid, your older brother is gay as fuck and this is a testament to it 
> 
> To any of my irls, particularly Bees, in case they found this: [sweats]
> 
> To Kate: thanks for enabling me with this idea for the past month. I hope you enjoyed it!!!!
> 
> come yell at me about danganronpa and oumasai on [my tumblr](http://khattikeri.tumblr.com/)


End file.
